Missing the point
I’ve seen a couple of articles are in UK newspapers this week about EC. It seems to me generally the journalists are completely missing the point. It’s not about potty training your baby, or having them out of nappies younger, or forcing them to do something they’re not capable of. The point is, if your baby is squirming cos they need a wee or a poo, and you know that is why they are squirming, why on earth would you want to leave them to get poo all up their bum because it squidges around inside the nappy, when instead you can hold them over something and have a bum that is easy to clean and be able to put the same clean nappy back on again? How disrespectful would it be, to say “no, you have to go in your nappy”, if you have the option of holding them somewhere else? Obviously if you don’t know about EC you do what you can and change baby’s nappy as soon as you notice, and if you are EC’ing but driving the car or something it’s going to be hard to always have a potty stop. But if you are aware they need the loo and you can potty them, why is that a bad thing?
The argument that it’s the parent who is being trained is irrelevant - of course it’s the parent who is learning what to do, because as someone said on the Natural Infant Hygiene list this week, babies already *know*. In the same way, they know when they are hungry and signal.
I also think that though it’s a common idea that babies have no muscle control until at least 18 months, clearly L can release when he is cued by sound and position. He may not be able to hold it indefinitely, but he can signal before he reaches the point where it is going to come out no matter what, and can relax and wee or poo, so there must be some muscle ability at birth.
I think babies can be desensitised to their awareness, and learn that nappies are where you are supposed to wee and poo, and then they have to unlearn that when they are older and realise the big kids and adults don’t have nappies but use the toilet. L’s toilet fussing is what we called “colic” when M did the same kinds of things - I wonder if some colic is actually toilet fussing, and it stops by 3 - 4 months as babies learn to use a nappy???
Article in today’s Times: Is this baby too young to be potty trained?
Maggie Howell is the person who inspired me to take an interest in EC in the first place, as she was EC’ing her first son when M was a toddler and we went to the same La Leche League meetings, and then I went to the Continuum Concept group that she ran for a while.
This is the article from the Sunday Telegraph From birth to potty in 3 weeks. This one is a bit less negative.
And this is a news report from Chicago, with film clips of EC in action and interviews with parents.
We went shopping in Sainsburys this afternoon and while M and I were unloading the trolley, the checkout girl started chattering away as she scanned stuff through. She spotted L and started with “So what do you think of this potty training babies that’s in the papers today?”. Think I floored her when I said, “Oh, we do that!”. LOL
Barbara told me about this first a couple of years ago - i thought she was mad - but it clearly works for her! have to say though, even 4 children in, i haven’t identified a single thing that has said to me my child needs to wee or poo until they are 15-20 months. So either i’m clueless, or not watching properly, or they haven’t done it or all 3 (all 3 most likely) All power to your potty though
Comment by Merry — September 27, 2005 @ 10:19 pm
I wish I’d read up on it before we had Ben. It would’ve made the early days a lot easier as I used to worry that he was finding weeing painful, as he would whinge/stress just before he wee’d.
He spent most of his time at home nappyless though, so rather than taking him to the loo we’ld just get the teatowels ready when he was making it known that he needed to go lol. Which I think did help as he got control pretty early. We never got the poos sussed though, they always came with sudden force and at speed :0D
You’ve certainly inspired me to try it if we have any more, because you make it normal lol!
Comment by Tech — September 28, 2005 @ 12:57 pm
Oh, forgot to say, Dave’s nan did it with his mum, never had a dirty nappy to wash in her life! She always was ahead of her time, or maybe we’ve just gone backwards in the name of progress, but are slowly re evolving?
Comment by Tech — September 28, 2005 @ 1:01 pm
Merry, hats off to you to cope with 4 children and close together! Watching for wees and poos is a rather odd thing to try compared to the “norm” and I think I benefitted alot seeing Maggie EC her boys a little and slowly take in info about it. It’s very much trial and error and I miss loads of wees even though I’ve got fairly used to what I’m looking for. I don’t think I could have done it if I had a toddler too.
My comments were totally in response to the “experts” in the articles who say putting a baby on the potty is going to psychologically damage them, not as any kind of criticism of people who don’t do EC.
Comment by Administrator — September 28, 2005 @ 8:16 pm
Dave’s nan never had a dirty nappy? Ever??? She must’ve been on the ball then! My mum used to put me and my sis on the potty, it’s just before I knew much about EC I assumed it was the “sit them on the potty alot and you’ll catch some just by chance” thing, or just that we were predictable by being fed on a schedule. I think perhaps we have gone backwards a bit, because disposables are so easy and there’s less incentive to worry about potty training and also toddlers don’t feel the wet. The new Pampers ads are interesting with the wet strip thing.
Poos certainly can come with force, can’t they? LOL We were completely off today, only got one wee and the second half of a poo in the toilet, and L managed 2 very loud and explosive poos in the theatre. Sure the whole audience must have heard him!
Comment by Administrator — September 28, 2005 @ 8:22 pm
Amen to your post, Kath! I feel like I’ve said the same soooo many times. It’s why I hate the term ‘infant potty training’ as I think it gives totally the wrong impression.
I remember with Beth at toddler group, friends thought I was nuts when I’d suddenly jump up, hearing her subtle ’sound’ from the other side of a crowded hall. But I never had a dirty nappy from her past 12 months (except if she was poorly) and even her ‘well’ poos never seemed to get past the breast-feeding variety, so that suited me fine! Wees did take longer, but I’m sure that’s because I was so laid back about it as nappies are so easy these days. Unfortunately I’m not having the same results with Rachael, and I’m not sure it’s all down to having to split my attention 3-ways. Still meaning to write up a full account on my blog, but not managed to even keep up with the day-to-day stuff atm!
Comment by Barbara — October 5, 2005 @ 4:22 pm
Oh, and nice to know you think I’m mad, Merry ;-P
Comment by Barbara — October 5, 2005 @ 4:27 pm